Lu Wu Pays the Check

Maybe this wasn’t a good idea, I thought as a giant spider began to descend from the ceiling of the restaurant. I started to run, but before I could take my second step the spider shot a web at me, tangling my legs and most of my body. I fell to the floor. It landed on the ground stalked toward me, its massive mandibles twitching eagerly, saliva dripping from its mouth. I struggled against the webbing, trying to free myself, but it was too strong. The spider was soon on top of me, its mouth open as it bent down toward me. I didn’t know what I could do. It seemed like there was nothing I could do to stop it, but then the spider suddenly froze.

“Frank,” I heard a man mutter. “Of course it’s you.”

I looked up to see my savior. I was quite relieved to see it was, “Lu Wu!”

“What did you do, Frank?” he asked, as he walked toward me. “Why would you do all this? Why would you bring your chaos into my backyard?”

“We needed…” I began but he raised his hand to quiet me.

“Hold that.” Lu began to drift away, blasting the monsters in his way, including G’fon and the creature he was fighting with. The giant worm went for him, mouth open, but Lu just sent it off to another dimension with the wave of his hand. He walked up to the destroyed table where we had been sitting several minutes ago and began tossing aside the debris. He found G’fon’s magical lure and held it up. He sighed and switched it off. The screaming in the back of my head finally stopped.

The fighting paused. Everyone looked up, human, monster, other. Everyone looked around the room uncertainly. The sudden stop of the lure caught them all unexpected (and relieved). Lu took center stage and began to speak to all of them in Chinese. The three headed man yelled back at him. Lu replied to him calmly, sounding apologetic. That took some of the wind out of the three headed man’s sails. But he still seemed irritated and yelled a bit before vanishing off.

As soon as Lu made the man disappear, the fighting started up again, as if it were a signal for them to do so. Lu instantly got to work casting them away, starting with the larger monsters. I watched, happy that someone was able to take control and that I now had time to free myself from the spider web. Tam eventually came over to help me. We then went over to Kink to try to cut her down from the wall. Together we got her down safely.

“Looks like my plan worked,” G’fon said, coming over toward us, slightly bloodied.

“Yeah, G’fon,” Tam replied, sourly. “It worked real great.”

“Oh yeah? Well you tell me, is that or is that not the guy we’re looking for?” G’fon asked.

“It is,” I admitted, “but you also destroyed the restaurant along the way and who knows how many people you endangered, let alone actually hurt.”

“Eh, what’s one restaurant compared to all of time and space?”

“And what about the people in the restaurant?”

“Most of them are still alive.”

“That was very careless of you,” Lu said, coming toward us now that the restaurant had more or less been cleared of monsters. “Do you realize the danger you have caused putting a magical lure in the middle of major metropolitan city?”

“Yes, but I had a good reason.”

“A good reason? To cause all of this mayhem? I truly doubt that.”

“We needed to find you,” G’fon explained. “We’re in ser…”

He paused as the room suddenly began to fill up with Time Cops.

“By the seventeen gods of West Hourly!” Lu exclaimed. “Who are those people and how did they get past my magical barriers?”

“Those are the Time Police,” I told him, quickly. “And we need to get out of here. Right now!”

“Freeze, fugitives!” one of the Time Cops said, pointing aggressively at us. “We have cordoned off the area in a temporal stasis bubble. There is nowhere for you to go!” The eight-armed woman turned to him and screamed at him in Chinese. “Calm down, miss,” the cop told her.

She charged at him. The Cops zapped her and she vanished. “What the…!?” Lu exclaimed.

“They erased her from the timeline!” Tam explained.


“From history! From ever existing!” I told him. “And they’re going to do it to all of us if we don’t get out of here! Right now! Right! Now!”

“There’s nowhere you can escape, fugitives,” the Time Cop said. “We will follow you and we will detain you for your many crimes. There is no time you can go to that we’re not already there.”

“No time?” Lu repeated. “But I bet there’s a few places you can’t go!”

With a flash, we were gone. No longer were we in a restaurant in China, but instead we were now on the top of a mountain.

to be continued…


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